2018 - James Kirst Short Story and Novel Blog

Short Story Saturday: Why You Never Celebrate in a Weird Bar

Posted on December 29, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

Hello everyone! As part of Short Story Saturday, I have posted another short story, this one entitled Why You Never Celebrate in a Weird Bar. Please enjoy.

Waking up after a bender is never a fun thing but you can get used to anything if it’s done long enough. After a while, dealing with dry mouth and nausea became as part of the morning routine as wiping the crud out of your eyes. At least, that’s my excuse as to why I never bothered giving up staying up late drinking at random dive bars, but my latest experience and this sudden pain in my chest is beginning to change my mind. To think, it all happened this morning. Allow me to explain.

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Short Story Saturday: Christmas Eve in Utqiagvik

Posted on December 22, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

Hello everyone! As part of Short Story Saturday, I have posted another short story, this one entitled Christmas Eve in Utqiagvik. Please enjoy.

I’m sure most diners get out-of-town visitors all the time. Sure, I mean, I’m sure every eatery has its regulars but a stranger coming in to dine would hardly be a momentous occasion for most. The visitor would have to be quite the character to leave an impression. However, when you live in my neck of the woods, or should I say, tundra, all you have are regulars so a visitor definitely leaves an impression. I will say, though, it is doubtful that anybody would forget the man who came in a few nights ago.

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Short Story Saturday: Non Morieris in Somnis Memorias

Posted on December 15, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

Hello everyone! As part of Short Story Saturday, I have posted another short story, this one entitled Non Morieris in Somnis Memorias. Please enjoy.

I’m walking through immaculate streets and surrounded by large and luxurious homes, monuments of better days. This place was once vibrant and full of life, now sterile, and empty except for the leaves blowing in the wind. A looming clock tower stands in the center of town. Its ticking hands reverberate inside my skull each passing step perpetually reminding me of the inexorable nature of time.

I am exhausted. Mentally. Physical fatigue is impossible here.

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Short Story Saturday: Consumed With Guilt

Posted on December 8, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

Hello everyone! As part of Short Story Saturday, I have posted another short story, this one entitled Consumed With Guilt. Please enjoy.

I never wanted to be a criminal. Oh Mama, what would you think of your baby boy now? A cop car is parked outside my home right now. He’s been out there for nearly an hour. He’s waiting for me. He wants to give me a chance to confess. I will, but only after writing down my thoughts so I don’t get flustered when I make my statement in court. Public speaking makes me so nervous.

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50 Tastes and Flavors

Posted on December 7, 2018August 26, 2019 by jkirst

Hey everyone! I thought it’d be fun if I shared with you the only fan fiction I ever wrote, something I penned a few years ago. I think you’ll see that this was a “completely serious attempt” to write a “completely serious fan fiction”. The story is entitled 50 Tastes and Flavors.

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Short Story Saturday: A Lesson in Humility

Posted on December 1, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

Hello everyone! As part of Short Story Saturday, I have posted another short story, this one entitled A Lesson in Humility. The original writing prompt is taken from https://www.writersdigest.com/prompts/antiquing-writing-prompt.

It was not a family reunion that should have ever happened. It defied the laws of… God? Nature? Life itself? To think it none of this would have ever happened had I not been so desirous for fame. Such is the price of learning a lesson in humility.

I’m an author of very little renown, likely I’m nobody you’ve ever heard of. You may be familiar with my grandfather, though. If you’re a fan of his works, you’ll know who I mean. I think about him daily.

Of course, he’d be easier to forget if I didn’t have to pass his grave daily. Admittedly, as convenient as it was, I shouldn’t have buried him so close to home. Loathe as I am to admit this, his fame haunts me. Appropriate, I suppose, as he did love to write about the supernatural.

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Short Story Saturday: An Amusing Tale of Scriptwriting

Posted on November 24, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

Hello everyone! As part of Short Story Saturday, I have posted another short story, this one entitled An Amusing Tale of Scriptwriting. It‘s quite a bit less sad than last week’s story but hopefully just as enjoyable. Original writing prompt taken from https://www.writersdigest.com/prompts/one-shot

The click of the pistol’s hammer woke me. A velvety voice lilts out of my vision, “Give me a good catchphrase and I just may let you live.”

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A True Friend, Part of Short Story Saturday!

Posted on November 17, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

Hello everyone! Introducing for the first time a new feature on my blog called Short Story Saturday! Every Saturday I will be posting a short story for your perusal. While some may be connected to other stories, they are going to be, for the most part, one-offs. I hope you enjoy them. The first one is entitled A True Friend.

I gradually awake from my unconscious slumber. I’m lying on my side on the cold, damp muddied dirt on this foreboding night struggling to breathe. My chest heaves up and down deliberately as I take deep, measured pants of the air, each gasp sending shockwaves of pain in my chest as if tiny little knives were stabbing my ribs. An oppressive cold seizes my shivering body. The trees that surround me with their limb-like branches that extend towards the heavens like giant, arboreal fingers shield even the most basic illumination making visibility an issue.

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Ghosts are Assholes Launches Today!

Posted on November 12, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

Happy to announce that my first book, Ghosts are Assholes, published by World Castle Publishing, LLC, is launched today on Amazon and other online sites in e-book and paperback form. Please see the main page for more details or click on the image above to get to the Amazon order page. If you enjoy the story, please feel free to submit a review on Amazon, Goodreads, or any other review site you can think of. Please subscribe to the blog for more updates and short stories in the future. I hope to write more novels in the future as well so please look out for that too.

As a bit of a celebration of the release, please read a bonus short story involving the adventures of everyone’s favorite medium, Vincent Pietro. It is entitled The Friendliest Ghost I Know:

“Are you sure you want to go in here?” Vincent asked. He was directing his question toward the apparition standing beside him. Both were near a blue door outside a white rambler.

“I have to know exactly what happened,” the poltergeist explained.

“Ed pretty much told us. He’s one of my closest friends and the most trustworthy man I know.”

“It’s not that I doubt the veracity of your friend the desk sergeant. I just need to confirm.”

“Your memories still haven’t returned?”

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What I Learned In School Today

Posted on November 9, 2018December 3, 2023 by jkirst

As a bit of a supplement to my upcoming book, Ghosts are Assholes, here is another vignette into Vincent’s life that I hope you enjoy. It is entitled What I Learned In School Today.

“What’s the answer to number 2?” the young boy asked the dowdy ghost floating over his left shoulder just above a whisper. He didn’t want to risk attracting the attention of his fourth-grade teacher sitting behind her desk.

“Vincent!” the apparition admonished. “Are you asking me to cheat?”

“Uh-huh!” the boy replied eagerly.

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